From Overwhelmed to Overjoyed: 4 Steps to Find Your Spark As a Mom in 30 Minutes

Have you ever wondered how to reconnect with your favorite self, even when MOM-life feels overwhelming? 

Join us in this enlightening session as we explore the "sparkly place"—a transformative art journal therapy exercise that helps you rediscover your inner joy and light, especially amidst the chaos of motherhood. 

This podcast episode was recorded in The Motherload Membership and I just had to share it with you!

The Sparkly Place: The Expressive Art Therapy Process

1. 5 MIN BRAIN DUMP: To really arrive and ground into today’s topic
2. 10 MIN GUIDED VISUALIZATION: To relax more deeply and unwind the mind.
3. 20 MIN CREATIVE PRACTICE: To reveal inner knowing and express yourself.
4. 5 MIN JOURNAL QUESTIONS: To reflect and find meaning.

Brain Dump

FINISH THE FOLLOWING STATEMENTS WITH YOUR FIRST THOUGHT:Spend a few minutes brain-dumping what your sparkly place would look like (it doesn't have to be an actual "place" it could just be the essence of what finding your spark, or sparkly would feel like to you).

• When I’m in my sparkly place...
  • I would like to...
  • I don’t want to...
  • I feel...
  • I want...
  • I need...

Visualization

• Invitation to close your eyes.
• If you can’t, gaze at something soft.
• Tend to your kids when they need you.
• If you find yourself distracted in your mind or surroundings, try to bring yourself back to your breath & body (without judgment).

Creative Practice 

ART JOURNAL PROMPT

• Using bright, neon or metallic colors, draw, doodle, paint, or collage your spark and/or sparkly place. Focus on creating bold, striking marks that stand out against the background. This one can be really fun when you use a black or dark background.

WRITING PROMPT:

• Write “My Sparkly Place” at the top of your journal page. Write with bold colors and write big on the page, don’t confine yourself to the lines or the proper way to write. Just write everything that comes to mind after that visualization.

Journal Questions

• Give your art piece a title.
• Look at what you’ve created and write down 6 spontaneous words.
• What part of the process was most difficult, emotional, or fun for you?
• One word
• One thought
• One feeling

Chapters

• 0:00 Embracing Your Sparkly Place
• 25:38 Creative Motherload Membership Recommendation

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening. Whatever you're watching and recording, good morning to those of us who are here live. I'm starting a little bit late this morning. I'm sorry. If you can hear anything in the background. I think I have my audio settings set, but you cannot hear the co-occurring screaming. It's happening downstairs, day one of children coming from school and my no child care. So here we go.

Speaker 1: 0:27

We are talking today about the Sparkling Place. Now, you don't have to have watched or participated in the previous three in order to experience what we're going to experience today. However, I am going to just give a little bit of a recap of what we have done, in case you have done those things and would like to link what you're doing today back to those other things. But this also can be done as a standalone. Do not have that feeling of like I did not do the other things so now I cannot participate in this. No, this can be totally standalone. So we started with the stuck place, then we moved into the emotional or the emotion tornado, then the messy middle and now we are going to be in and embracing and embodying the sparkly place today, if you would like to hold what you have done in the last three sessions while we move through today. I would invite you to do that, because they are connected kind of in this series and when I facilitate these for people sometimes they're not always in this order when we're doing one-on-one work and sometimes they are, and so the sparkly place is the place where you embody your favorite self not your best self, not even really your wellest self, but your favorite self. And when I'm working with moms who have lost themselves to motherhood or they are in self-abandonment or self-betrayal or self-emotional neglect, all unconsciously and unintentionally, what they're longing for and this word that has come up a lot in the last seven years of working with women is spark. I've lost my spark or my spark is dimmed or I don't have any light. And so the sparkly place I created alongside one client that is very memorable and if you've, if you've been on the blog, you've read about Andrea Andrea is her pseudonym. Um, we did these exercises together and she was actually one of the first people that I that I did this series with. I had done all of these exercises separately, um, but with Andrea her the things that she was coming to me, it just worked that we did them all in order.

Speaker 1: 3:07

And so when we think about our sparkly place and our favorite self and being able to advocate and stand like, just stand in our inner knowing and be able to reach for and grab the things that we know we need, whatever they are, we feel that light nestle inside of us. We feel like it's not only dark or it's not only twisty or it's not only challenge or struggle or hard. And even in the sparkly place, even when things are happening around us, even when our stuck place is just right over there or we are right in the middle of an emotional tornado or we're right in the mucky, mucky, mucky mucky middle, that spark still is there and we can still access it. So it's not the absence of any of those things. It is still feeling that light nestled inside of us. We're still feeling that that spark or being able to access it. So I just wanted to give a little bit of that context before we get started today. And yeah, we're going to follow our regular rhythm today I've got a five minute brain dump sentence stems prompts for us. We're going to move into the guided visualization. We're probably just going to spend 15 minutes on the creative practice today just because I'm getting started a little late and then we'll close with that writing reflective process at the end.

Speaker 1: 4:51

So to start our morning, or whenever you're watching this, I want you to spend a few minutes brain dumping what your sparkly place would look like. Is it an outside place? Is it an internal space? Is it that finding your internal spark or is it more of a? You imagine yourself in an environment and this is supposed to be fun for anybody who has a tendency to overthink or second guess or really struggles to embrace that lightness or joy or fun. You know, right now, this is your permission slip to embrace fun and bright and light. And so whatever first comes to your mind when you think about your sparkly place or your spark, that's what I want you to write about. And if that feels out of reach, even in this brain dump, I think it's appropriate to write down anything that's coming to mind, like this isn't coming to me, this sucks, I can't access it. I'm just not feeling it today. Like just write honoring whatever is happening for you right now, today, just honoring that and writing that down, and then a couple more prompts that might help you get into the zone when I'm in my sparkly place or when I'm feeling that spark. I would like to. I don't want to, I feel I want, I need. So we're going to spend, I will set a. Don't even have my phone, I'm going to go find it, um, and I'm going to set about a four minute timer for this this morning. This is your cue to pause the podcast and check the show notes for the journal questions and spend as much time as you'd like on the journal questions and then hit unpause when you're ready to come back.

Speaker 1: 6:49

Okay, finish up that thought you're having and give yourself a moment to transition. Now we'll stop for a moment to transition, finding a comfortable place, comfortable position. We're starting with a few deep belly breaths. Thank you, just noticing, just noticing, just noticing how the body feels today, no particular intention or attuning, justmn in a little verse. I want you to draw your attention in, Draw your attention in. We tend to focus a lot or live a lot in the head, in the thinking mind moment, but in this moment, giving yourself the permission to turn in, turn towards, just notice. Notice where in your body this spark or your sparkling place or sparkle energy might come from. If it feels uncertain, like you can't really identify, you know, a part of your body or a sensation that would lend itself to that sparkle feeling.

Speaker 1: 10:32

I just also want you to just honor what is Honor, the I don't know or I don't, or can't or won't feelings. And for those of you who can identify a spot in their body that feels particularly light or sparkling, I want you to honor that location. And if you're someone who's struggling to notice, I want you to tune in to your heart, your heart center, heart center, and I want you to imagine a bead of light nestled deep within your heart center or the body part that you were drawn to in the first place. And I just want you to feel this lightness, this sparkliness, this vibrancy, even if you're someone who has a vitamin accessing you. And I want you to allow that light and that sparkle to spread, to move, to grow, to expand and to feel a sense of delight, reward and joy, and spread that feeling throughout your body, push it, pull it into the places that often feel tension, dark, twisty or hard. Struggle you, you are the sleep, you are magic, you are Delight. Just in this moment, for this time. Believe that, just notice the physical sensation that comes up when you notice and pay attention and activate that spark or sparkle inside of you.

Speaker 1: 14:29

I just want you to pay attention to what happens when you can push that sparkle even outside of yourself, when that energy comes from within you and you are able to feel it, notice it, embrace, love on it, and you're able to actually move that energy, that lightness, that sparkle, outside of yourself. Now imagine that that sparkle would be a place you could access. Is there a scene or a metaphor, a color or a shape that can, a symbol that can remind you of your own inner sparkle, or the sparkly place you want to create? What is the, the place, the metaphor, the color, the shape, the symbol that would allow you to remember, remember, you are the reward, you are the you, you the spark, the spark, you, you, the sparkle. A little glimmer, a little moment, a little lightness reminds you of that.

Speaker 1: 16:54

While we can blame our obstacles or limitations or lack of money or opportunity or ability or willingness or excuses, others ourselves, when we acknowledge those limitations, when we see them for what they are and when we figure out a way to still sparkle, not in a toxic positivity way, in a real healing, acknowledging and accepting way, everything begins to change the way you think, the way you act, the way others see you, the way you see me. If you feel called, put your hand over your heart, you feel that sparkle, taking a few deep breaths in this place. Whenever you're ready, you can slowly and gently bring yourself back to the room and our creative practice prompts today are using whatever colors or essence were kind of came to you in the meditation to draw, doodle, paint or collage your spark or sparkly place. And I want you to really focus on creating bold, striking marks or contrast against the background, and this can be really fun when you use a black or a dark background to really create that contrast. And if you're more in a writing space today, I would like you to write my sparkly place at the top of your journal page and I want you to pay attention and use intentionally, while you're writing, grab a couple of bold colors highlighters Maybe you want to write in marker instead of pen and write big and bold on the page. Don't confine yourself to the lines or the proper way to write, even as if you choose the writing prompt, and I want you to just write everything that comes to your mind after that visualization, but doing it in a really bold and creative way by using color and bold cursive or block letters. Maybe you want to do your journal a little bit like you used to when you were a teenager or an adolescent, where you didn't confine yourself to the lines of the page.

Speaker 1: 20:36

So we're going to engage in this practice, or I suggest engaging in this practice for about 15 minutes, and then, when those 15 minutes are over, when you're watching the recording, I speed up my process. So you might have to pause me before the journal questions. For those of you live, we're going to do it in live time and then, after those 15 minutes, I'm going to give you a little bit of a transitional threshold to come back and then I'll do put up the reflection questions from our process today and then we'll take it from there. This is your cue to get out your art supplies or your art journal, or a paper and a pen, or a post-it and an envelope. However. You're going to express yourself today and press pause on the podcast, because on the YouTube video you can see my process, but on the podcast I have cut that piece of silence out. So pause the podcast now, get out your art supplies and create for as long as you need creating and then check out the show notes for the post creative practice journal questions and then you can hit unpause to hear a verbal debrief of my particular process of the sparkly place.

Speaker 1: 21:56

Okay, still waiting for mine to dry, since I used watercolor, but I plan on adding a few more vibrant layers to this, and then I just honored where the colors were going to go and the flow of the watercolor. I felt like watercolor was a fitting medium for me because I didn't want to. I wanted it to be bold, but I didn't want it to be the like the lines like a marker would make um. So I love these neon watercolors that I have from Stonegrounds. They're actually based in Regina and um, I'm gonna add some more details to it. I'll post it in the group once. Once I'm going to add some more details to it. I'll post it in the group once I'm done with it.

Speaker 1: 23:05

But the sparkly place for me is a place where I am fully myself. I am saying what I mean. I am saying yes when I mean yes and no when I mean no. I don't always acknowledge the second guessing or the brain gremlins that can come from a stuck place or that messy middle, and so when I'm in my sparkly place, I am. I am not abandoning myself, and self abandonment is something you're going to hear me talk a lot about in the coming months.

Speaker 1: 23:57

I'm part of a co author project. There's about 10 or 12 of us writing a book together, and my whole chapter is on self-abandonment and my own personal story with it and how I acknowledge it and overcome it. And if you're not familiar with self-abandonment, just go ahead and give it a Google. It's basically's basically when you avoid, suppress or numb your own feelings, thoughts, needs and desires, and as women, we are conditioned to do this pretty well, um and anyway. So that's, that's just what's been on my mind lately and that's what my sparkle place is.

Speaker 1: 24:40

It is the opposite. It is the opposite of self-abandonment and for me, the opposite of self-abandonment is self-expression being able to speak the words I want to speak, being able to make parenting choices the way that I would want to make them. Tuning in instead of tuning out. Yeah, so that is like, in a summary, my mind. I was like up till like almost midnight last night writing pieces of my chapter, so it's just like it's right front of mind for me today, anyway, to uh stop the recording now and for anybody who would he's here live, who would like to share, um, I opened the floor up to you and I look forward to our next session of the mother load together.

Speaker 1: 25:38

If you liked the process today, I encourage you to check out my Motherload membership for moms who are looking to express themselves creatively and calm the chaos of motherhood. Head over to the show notes. Also, if you enjoyed today, please leave us a review. The reviews allow us to get in front of more moms who need this in their lives. Thank you so much for being here. See you next week.